6.20.2015

My Home Birth after Cesarean

Life has been a roller-coaster ride lately. Moving back home after being away for almost 10 years was like moving to a new town. New house, new school, opening a new practice. With all the excitement and stresses of owning your own business, along with growing a baby, time just flew by. This pregnancy was wonderful - easy, healthy and very enjoyable. Regular yoga and chiropractic kept me feeling relaxed, pain-free and functioning perfectly!


1 week before the birth...
With this being our second baby, it very important to involve Nolan in the pregnancy and birth. I found a wonderful book about a home birth called "Hello Baby". Nolan took to it right away and loved it. It became our night-time reading ritual and he leaned all about labor pains, pushing and placentas!

With this pregnancy, I was much more educated on birth and having witnessed several births through my doula clients, I felt much more prepared. Towards the end of the pregnancy, I started to envision my birth. Every evening when we got home from work around 7:00ish, I would look outside our windows and see the sun setting over the lake. The lake was calm with ducks swimming. The evening sky was all pinks and purples and the house was calm and peaceful. I would say everyday that this would be the perfect time of day to birth our baby.  I re-read Ina May's Guide To Childbirth and loved the story where the woman just walked around and went about her day in labor and before she knew it, it was time to push. I prayed everyday for an easy, quick labor.
A few days before I went into labor, the evening contractions (which I got every evening for a couple hours), lasted longer and were getting stronger. On the evening of June 19th, the contractions lasted all night. They were not painful, but stronger and I was aware of them all night long. The next day, June 20th, we went to work at the office (and were training our new office assistant!), while the contractions continued. They were still bearable, although through some of them I needed to stop talking. I did not think this was real - I was easily going throughout the day - and the fact that I needed to stop talking didn't faze me!

Around 2:30pm, we took Nolan to the park to play. We did not stay too long as the contractions were definitely getting stronger and squirming around on the bench was embarrassing. But I still didn't think this was "real labor"...

I drove home with Nolan while Avery went back to work for the afternoon shift. (I figured we still had plenty of time). At home, I changed into something more comfortable and my mom came by to take me to the store to pick up a few things. During a contraction, I literally had to lean over the shopping cart and hold in my urge to moan, while other shoppers gave us some strange looks.

It was now about 4:00pm. Finally at home I could relax more and the contractions came on closer together. I called my midwife and doula. My midwife said to call her back in a hour and to try to keep track of how close they were. I called hubby to let him know how I was doing and to come home as soon as he could. I cleaned up the house and started to get ready. I knew this baby was coming tonight, but I had no idea how soon. I put on music and lit some candles. I ate some fruit. I continued to walk around the house and during contractions I had to squat or kneel down and moan through it. They were close, about 3 minutes. Before the hour was up, I called Jyl and told her she should come now. I called Avery and begged him to come home NOW - I wanted to get in the birth tub!!

We decide to let Nolan do whatever felt comfortable for him. I did not want to force him to be in our bedroom, nor did I ban him from our birthing space. My mom was there to assist him. I think he felt included, but with a little distance.

At this point I had completely lost track of time and what was going on. All I remember was that I was in the warm tub. It felt amazing and really eased the contraction pains, which were coming on strong now. I remember eating some fruit, and I could still hear the music playing. I was totally in my zone - I did not feel scared, just ready. Jyl arrived (around 6:30pm I think), set up her stuff and wanted to check me. I was afraid of her telling me I was not even half way there. I did not know how much longer I could do this - but I was already 10 cm! What?! Already? I had completely dilated and not even realized how far along I was. She said I could push when I felt the urge.
My amazing birth team...

I know now why women birthing in hospitals ask for drugs. If I had to lay in bed, with a fetal monitor on every 30 minutes, I would be asking for pain relief too! The ability to move around, squat, kneel, whatever - that WAS my pain relief.

My doula, Jen, arrived and I felt so much better knowing she was there. Avery was in the tub with me, hugging me, rubbing my back. The contractions subsided for a bit - the time where they stop to give you a break before the hard work of pushing begins. They came back on full force and the urge was there. Awareness was gone - it was all just primal feelings, hormones, sensations. Brain turned off; body just took over. I was on my hands and knees, that felt the best, and pushed when I felt I needed to. Not a real "push", more like bearing down - the uterus did all the pushing, whether I wanted it to or not! I was making some loud, un-human-like sounds, but I didn't care, or was even really aware of it. I used my voice to push the baby down and cope with the sensations.  Although it seemed like forever, I really only pushed for about 20 minutes. I pushed when I wanted and how I wanted; no one touched me or directed my pushing - just beautiful encouraging words and loving contact from my midwife, doula and husband.  I could feel the baby's head moving down through the birth canal. I reached down and could feel the head emerging, the bag still intact. It broke and the head came out. Then with the next contraction, I felt one shoulder, turn, two shoulders, turn, and a little body slipped out of me. Relief! It all happened so fast. I reached down and pulled up our baby to my chest. Relaxing back against the tub, I held it close, and then looked - It was a boy! Blake! He looked just like Nolan. I called for Nolan to be brought into my bedroom. His face was priceless - he looked like he wanted to cry out of happiness. Along with us, he instantly fell in love with his baby brother. Some people might think a 4-year-old should not be around a birth, but we prepared Nolan, and we felt it was an intimate part of growing our family. Nolan knew that Mommy would be making lots noises and maybe yelling and crying and that is ok, because that is what happens when babies are born.

I continued to hold Blake and relax in the tub, nursing him. He barely cried. He was born in the
Bliss
water, in a warm, dimly-lit room. I was the only one that touched him. No poking, pulling or prodding. He was spontaneously born, in perfect form. No need to suction him - the uterus contracting squeezed all the fluids out of his lungs. No need to wipe him down - the vernex perfectly protects his skin. No need to monitor his heart or temperature - skin-to-skin helped him regulate it on his own. Unlike in a hospital, everyone around us was calm and relaxed. There was nothing to really "do" because there was nothing to "manage" - we just needed to wait for the cord to stop pulsing and the placenta to be born. No drops, no vaccines, no interference. And, yes, he was adjusted.

My prayers had been answered. My birth was quick, only about 4 hours of active labor. Blake was born at my "perfect" time of day at 7:52pm. The lights were off in the bedroom, and the curtains were open, letting in the beautiful sunset. My previous prayer for Nolan was also answered. Four years ago, when Nolan was born, I promised him that with our next baby, he would be able to experience the miracle of birth.

My children's births have each taught me valuable lessons - to surrender, to trust, to persevere, to find my inner strength, to have faith. I am stronger because of each experience. I have always trusted the birth process, but to have experienced it myself, especially after a Cesarean, after the "medical model" calls it unsafe, I trust in it - and me! - even more! Birth is normal and natural. If left undisturbed, it follows it own perfect sequence of events. Birth does not need to be "managed". All it needs is to be protected, in a safe and sacred space.



8.05.2014

The Doula


The Doula...
Protects the sacred birth space

that moment gave me strength...
Listens, listens and listens more
May not understand the mother's feelings, but does not minimize her feelings
Helps the mother feel heard
Keeps the mother safe and secure
Does not compare, judge, belittle or criticize
Validates the mother's wishes and decisions
Respects the mother and her birth choices
Empathizes that some decisions can be hard to make, but might be necessary
Sympathizes when a dream is shattered
Understands that birth plays a very significant role in shaping a woman into a mother
Realizes that every aspect of the birth, good or bad, will replay in the mother's head for the rest of her life
Knows that birth can be traumatic
Rejoices when birth is healing
Believes in the innate birth process
Witnesses miracles everyday


11.22.2013

Be the Change

"Be the Change You Want to See in the World" - Gandhi

Gandhi said to BE the change; not say, lecture, advise or even expect people to make the change because of you. Pressuring people to change before they mentally are ready will never work, and they usually end up resenting you.

I think this is hard for most people, because as humans, we really DO want what is best for the people we care about. What is "best"? What WE think is best. What works for us. Where we found success. And this is where the problem lies. What is "best" or what works for one person, is not always what works for the next. Sometimes, people feel judged and criticized if you make a suggestion, offer advise or question their ways, especially if they are already uncertain about their decisions.

This is something that I struggle with personally, because as a doula, childbirth educator and yoga instructor, I have a lot of information, research and knowledge - plus all the health info I get from my chiropractic husband. As a mother of two, I do not think that I am better mother, but perhaps a more "seasoned" mother, having parenting experience for the past 4+ years. My many "jobs" involve me teaching, sharing, coaching and counseling - it's inherently in me! I love to help; Its hard for me to say no. I am a giver.

Maybe I give too much? Maybe I should wait for them to ask first? It is hard for me not to let my opinion slip, especially if the topic is on something I feel passionate about - like attached parenting, breastfeeding, chiropractic or nutrition.

I am inspired by the mothers that I know go confidently into their parenting journey. I learn from them everyday. Everything we do may not be exactly the same, but they are a resource, a sounding-board, a shoulder to lean on. I am already confident in my decisions, and being around these ladies builds my confidence even more.

I have made this resolution before, but I am setting my intentions again:

Be the Change.
Lead by Example - Quietly.  
The Only Person You Can Change is Yourself.
Live Gently, Love Unconditionally.
Smile.










11.09.2013

Lemon Treats - Recipe

The sweetness of the dates, the tart lemon - this little bite is truly a treat! Tons of fiber and omega-3's.

Lemon Treats:
1 cup pitted dates
1 cup raw walnuts
1/2 cup chia seeds
1/4 cup lemon juice
2 tsp fresh grated lemon zest
unsweetened coconut flakes (the real kind!)

Place all items except coconut flakes in food processor or high powered blender and pulse until well mixed. Place in bowl and chill for 15-30 minutes. Roll into little balls and then roll in coconut flakes. Keep refrigerated.

10.30.2013

Paleo Pumpkin Brownie - Recipe

Yes....it's Holiday time again! My favorite time of year, and so ready to start cooking and baking healthy, holiday comfort food.

I came across this recipe. It's so easy and really tasty, without being too sweet.

Paleo Pumpkin Brownie:
1 cup almond butter
3/4 cup pumpkin puree
1 egg
1/3 cup honey
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp cinnamon
1/8 tsp cardamom
(you can add/subtract spices to your taste)

Preheat over to 350*. Mix all ingredients well. Oil baking dish with EVCO and place batter evenly in dish. Bake for approx. 25 minutes.

10.04.2013

Womanly Support

I love everything about pregnancy and birth. I love being around pregnant bellies - which is why my favorite type of yoga to teach is prenatal! And I love being surrounded by women that I admire, respect and support. I am so lucky to have found this little "family", many of these women are like my sisters - we have cried and laughed, agreed and disagreed, but at the end of the day we are one in the same - women that support women. Being around like-minded women can give a new mama so much peace.

Women, of course, lean on and depend on their partners. I certainly do. My husband is my rock, and the only person in the world who truly knows and understands me. But there is something about having that womanly support to compliment his support. Women just understand certain things. Sometimes we don't even have to say it, we just know.

Being a doula and childbirth educator, I enjoy sharing and educating mommies-to-be on how women are amazing creatures. Our bodies can grow, birth and nourish a baby all by ourselves. Through undisturbed birth, and positive birth and parenting experiences, women become highly in tune to their "mommy-instincts" - those hormones that help us nurture and protect our babies. Our bodies are actually natural "vaccines" for our babies - during a natural birth the baby ingests the mother's vaginal bacteria to help form proper gut integrity. Through kissing and being close to baby, mother will automatically create antibodies that are then released in her breastmilk to help baby fight off infections. I like to remind women they know what is best for their baby, and to find the support that suits her needs, even if those needs differ from her best friend, her own mom, or mother-in-law.

My Birth Team


Witnessing the birth process is truly awesome and humbling. You literally see a woman transform into a mother; you feel her fears, perseverance, exhaustion, strength, joy and ecstasy.




Unfortunately, in today's American society, many mother's are subjected to fear-based pregnancy, childbirth and parenting from "experts" in magazines and so-called "reality" TV shows. Their perception of reality is so warped from the media that even when their "mommy-instincts" tell them otherwise, they ignore (or are told to ignore) and question these feelings and emotions. We all know that birth is highly managed in a hospital setting, doctors and nurses just waiting for something to happen so they can go in to "save the day". Post-partum is highly managed too - between all the pediatrician check-ups, poor breastfeeding advise, the push for formula and solids and numerous schedules to follow for eating, sleeping, bathing, playing, etc - no wonder and new mom questions her ability to mother. She clearly can not make a move without consulting with her doctor!

Finding a mothering or parenting group that resonates with you can be so reassuring. For me, I loved attending my local La Leche League and ITAV meetings. I always looked forward to that monthly meeting, and left feeling refreshed and connected. La Leache League, It Takes A Village .

Recently I was watching a animal documentary, studying a group of monkeys in Puerto Rico. They tested the female monkeys and concluded the ones that spent more time with other females had lower cortisol levels and lived longer. So, I guess hanging with your friends reduces stress, makes you happy and keeps you healthier!

"Inna put her two [midwife's] bricks on the ground and told Leah she would stand on them soon. She moved me and Zilpah on either side to lend support when Leah squatted over a bed of clean straw. Zilpah and I became Leah's chair, with our arms around her shoulders and beneath her thighs. 'You lucky girl, ' Inna said to Leah. 'Look at the royal throne of sisters you have.' " - from The Red Tent by Anita Diamant.



11.13.2012

Homemade Burrito - Recipe

I LOVE Mexican food, but it is not always prepared the most healthy way in restaurants. I do not like to eat corn tortillas because Corn is the most widely used GMO crop. Even the shells and seasonings sold in the grocery store have alot of preservatives and artificial ingredients. This meal is really easy and filling, and you can use whatever filling you have in the house.

Shells - Ezekial Bread Sprouted Tortilla shells (lightly toasted)
Meat - hormone-free/antibiotic-free/grass fed beef, buffalo, turkey, chicken or whatever, even eggs. Beans or quinoa work well for vegans. Cook in frying pan, season well.
Add in whatever chopped veggies you have - we used arugula and a mix of tomatoes, onions, cucumber, avocado chopped, with lemon juice added and lighted salted.
Cheese - I prefer raw, unpasteurized cheese.

Assemble meat, veggies and cheese on tortilla shell, wrap up and enjoy!

ps - Any leftover meat and veggies can be used the next day for a breakfast burrito with eggs!